Sentience in a seed-pod

My pirate name is:

Iron Tom Roberts

A pirate's life isn't easy; it takes a tough person. That's okay with me, though, since I am that person. Two things complete my pirate persona: style and swagger. Maybe a little too much swagger sometimes -- but who really cares? Arr!

This pointlessly objective evaluation of me comes courtesy of this pirate quiz.

Prognostications of the Perfect Prophet #2:

Mickey Mouse will one day govern Florida.

Não fumar
Smoking is cool. I don't smoke. People stand and smoke, and they justify their existence. Why are you here? I'm smoking. Why do you smoke when you don't need to? Because I want to. Smoking grants distance and detachment. Smoking is cool. Not smoking is firing in the moment; not smouldering like the end of that cigarette, but actually flaming. Smoking burns slowly. Not smoking burns brighter. Lose your alibi.

I used to have two black cat peanut booster bars. Unfortunately I have put them somewhere and I can't find them. Or someone has stolen them. In the latter case, I will need to hunt down the guilty party, strip them naked, douse them in battery acid and drag them over a field of broken glass from the back of a pick-up. Or I could just find where the hell I put those chocolates. Hmmmm. Chocolate.
What was I saying again?

Master Wang introduces his friends, episode 1:

Initiate: How do I find true enlightenment?
Master Wang: My friend Marc burps a lot. I think he has the plague.
Initiate: Ah, so by aligning desire with accountability, I become truly alive?
Master Wang: And sometimes he farts, but mostly it's just the burping.
Initiate: Master, you are truly great. How can I gain wisdom like yours?
Master Wang: But he's fun, and he has a killer sound system, so we still hang out.

The times on my postings do not reflect the times of the postings in South Africa, where I live. However, they do represent the actual time somewhere. As such, I find myself unable to deny the immutability of this parallel reality.

Pop quiz:

Are the Ls in 'parallel' present merely for their usefulness as a mnemonic device in the hands of highschool maths teachers?

And now I embark on an afternoon of not much. I should be working, and I am, sporadically, but I justify my lack of diligence with the thought that I'm supposed to get two days off after training anyhow. After Alberton, my brain is foggy and slow, and I wish to watch TV and lie upon my couch.

So, enough about me - what's up in your life?

Just kidding. I don't really care. A blog is intrinsically unilateral and selfish. Deal with it.

Prognostications of the Perfect Prophet #1:

No one will read this page.

I once found a blog that was intentionally mundane. But this blog is unintentionally mundane. In fact, no intent is associated with this blog. All my friends are doing a blog, except most of them. So I am too. And that's about all I want to say as an introduction. Oh, and I never finish anything I start.